WTF was I thinking?!?!?(Curtain Call) . . . Entry for March 22, 2007

During that long first night/morning together, I read him off my blog entry that discussed the possibility of us getting back together, and we both said we’d think about it. Now this "great idea" of mine was created without remembering that "Oh yea, he’s an alcoholic and control freak!" Well, to give him credit, he’s not really a control "freak" but he THINKS he’s always right, not a very endearing quality for me to swallow.

Also, I was reminded of other faults and failures of his (they are in my eyes) and the big one being racism. I wasn’t raised racist and didn’t teach my children to be either. But I have to remind the kids this is the South and when that kind of ignorance is shown, nothing you say will change their mind and it’s best just to ignore it and know that you are the better person.

My son and his Dad got into a HUGE fight over him using the "N" word, and I applauded my son (it would be my problem child too, lol) for standing up to his father. I told Ed, Shayne was in the right in the first place and to just fucking drop it. We did have fun off and on all weekend, but that "honeymoon" period lasted all of 48 hours and I was kind of ready for him to go home.

But the kids were having fun fishing and spending time with him, and Ed pulled off the ultimate coup, he got our sons to finish cleaning their room. He had to stand there and yell and threaten them the whole time, but I had to laugh, at least it wasn’t me, I’d done my tour of duty on that job! Ed blamed me for the kids’ behavior at first, but then saw that both boys were exactly like himself at that age.

I had a nice visit with my son Vaughan though, he managed to stay out of most of the arguments, lol. He missed all our pets (four new baby kittens too damnit!), not to mention he got to gather a few of his things to take with him, and wander around the woods and play with the dogs.

It took him 2 days, but my ex finally caught enough fish for dinner one night. He even caught a small bass that I didn’t even know lived in the lake, lol. The last 2 days of his visit we didn’t have sex at all. I was tired of his drunken, opinionated, smart ass by then, and throw PMS in the mix and it makes for a cranky Techy.

Ed is one of those types of drunks who can drink all day long and not really show it unless you know them well, and I know him extremely well. No way was he ever going to change and no way could I live with someone that drinks ALL the time, is ALLWAYS right, doesn’t like my music, and thinks he’s God, amongst other negative things. Occasional great sex ain’t worth all that!

Now that I’ve put any ideas of getting back together with my 1^st husband to bed for good, I just remembered that over the weekend I hand my oldest ex boyfriend Steve call me while he was drunk. Remember him from this past Fall’s posts? He was supposed to come out here from the SF Bay Area but never made it because he went to jail for a little bit . . .twice . . . and never made it out here?

He knows my ex back from when he moved out here for a while in 2000, and they got along great (since they’re both alcoholics). Well Steve calls right in the middle of us fucking, and needs to talk to me (according to him) and wanted to say Hi to Ed too. Needless to say I’m like "Go away, tell him I’ll call tomorrow" and damnit had to say it three times too because Steve was drunk.

I was crashed out the next afternoon when Steve called, and surprise surprise, he was drunk again! It’s always been my rule with him that I refuse to talk to him when he’s been drinking because I don’t like who he becomes and he knows this. But still he tries, and once again, I told him I’m hanging up, and to call me when he’s sober. And then he usually never does, like this time.

The weekend ended up lasting 5 very long days, but at least I got laid for a few days in a row , hehehhe!