I’ve been chatting with a friend on the deeper philosophical issues in life, such as wisdom, knowledge and truth, and how one doesn’t necessarily mean the other. For instance: knowledge isn’t wisdom, but a path to get there; and truth is not wisdom and so on and so forth. It was a pretty deep conversation, and I only barely grasped the subject on its crumbling edges (I admit to being stoned, lol), but anyways. . .It got me to thinking just now about that old song by The Tubes, “What Do You Want From Life?” and of course, I’m downloading it off of Limewire even as I type, lol. I remember when I was in college (U of L, Class of ’96) one of the questions asked in class was “Where do you see yourself in 15 years?” My smug ass answer was “CIO (Chief Information Officer) of a Fortune 500 company.”
Of course now I know that’s not what I want to be doing. I had my corporate dream job at the Federal Reserve Bank of San Francisco and it was assassinated by business politics. My illusions of rising high in the corporate ranks were completely destroyed, never to be seen again. So now here I am, living in the country, and doing independent contract work, keeping our heads above water and out of the homeless shelter.
But what do I really want from life? Some people might say, “Love”, but that is a double-edged sword, it cuts both ways. Its wounds are especially deep and painful if you don’t feel the same way they do. I’ve had this problem of people “falling” for me this past year. It didn’t use to be a problem, cause I usually fell right back, but that led in into quite a few bad relationships and I’m trying to kick that habit. I’m making sure next time I’m in love with the person and not just the feeling.
Lately one of the first things I tell people I get sexually involved with (on a regular basis) is “Falling in love with me would be the worst mistake of your life.” I say this because a) its true; and b) I usually become physically involved with someone before my emotions kick in. I know I know, it’s supposed to be the other way around, but I’m a horny bitch, OK?
One of my favorite quotes is this (said in Forrest Gump’s voice): “My Mama always said that to men, good head feels like love every time” and it’s a proven truism, at least to me anyways. C’mon, admit it guys, most men think with their little head and not with the big one, don’t they? There are of course, exceptions to every rule.
Anyways, I’m starting to ramble (lol), so the standard answer “Love” isn’t for me. Neither is a good job, meaning “Security”. I’ve had that and life can still suck ass. Next is “Money” well, money is good (duh!) but it isn’t everything, it has its own problems. “Respect”? Sorry, don’t need it, I’ve already got self-respect. I’m in decent “Health” so don’t need that either.
I’m pretty low maintenance so “Happiness” hasn’t hard to achieve (a clean house works great, now if my boys would only learn that, lol). I think what I really want from life is to have made this world a little bit better place be in when it’s time for me to leave it. Then I would have been successful. I want my epithet to be able to say, “She made us smile”. So what do you want from life?
What Do You Want From Life
Spooner/Evans (The Tubes)
What do you want from life
To kidnap an heiress
or threaten her with a knife
What do you want from life
To get cable TV
and watch it every night
There you sit
a lump in your chair
Where do you sleep
and what do you wear
when you're sleeping
What do you want from life
An Indian guru
to show you the inner light
What do you want from life
a meaningless love affair
with a girl that you met tonight
How can you tell when you're doin' alright
Does your bank account swell
While you're dreaming at night
How do know when you're really in love
Do violins play when you're touching the one
That you're loving
What do you want from life
Someone to love
and somebody that you can trust
What do you want from life
To try and be happy
while you do the nasty things you must
(this next part is kinda crazy, sung in “TV announcer” type voice, you really got to hear it to understand, lol)
Well, you can't have that, but if you're an American citizen you are entitled to:
a heated kidney shaped pool,
a microwave oven--don't watch the food cook,
a Dyna-Gym--I'll personally demonstrate it in the privacy of your own home,
a king-size Titanic unsinkable Molly Brown waterbed with polybendum,
a foolproof plan and an airtight alibi,
real simulated Indian jewelry,
a Gucci shoetree,
a year's supply of antibiotics,
a personally autographed picture of Randy Mantooth
and Bob Dylan's new unlisted phone number,
a beautifully restored 3rd Reich swizzle stick,
Rosemary's baby,
a dream date in kneepads with Paul Williams,
a new Matador, a new mastodon,
a Maverick, a Mustang, a Montego,
a Merc Montclair, a Mark IV, a meteor,
a Mercedes, an MG, or a Malibu,
a Mort Moriarty, a Maserati, a Mac truck,
a Mazda, a new Monza, or a moped,
a Winnebago--Hell, a herd of Winnebago's we're giving 'em away,
or how about a McCulloch chainsaw,
a Las Vegas wedding,
a Mexican divorce,
a solid gold Kama Sutra coffee pot,
or a baby's arm holding an apple?
(Other great songs by “The Tubes” include “White Punks On Dope” and “Don’t Touch Me There”)
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